Wednesday, 16 September 2015

Why Do People Mope?

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People are weird. They really are. So many of the things that we do make absolutely zero sense, and yet we continue to do them. Take moping for instance. Moping is something we do when we’re upset. I get it. Things aren’t exactly going your way so you mope around looking sad all day. I do it too, or I probably wouldn’t be writing this post. And it’s okay to be sad about something, but moping is more than just being sad. Moping is crawling into a self-pity hole and willingly forcing yourself to stay there. It’s allowing yourself to focus on every little thing that isn’t going right in your life, and it completely eradicates anything that is going right from your vision. Moping does absolutely nothing to fix problems. It delays problems. It makes them seem worse than they are. And that, is not a healthy way to live.

Okay, so let’s say you’re aware of this, but you really can’t drag yourself out of the moping mindset. I can’t really speak for other people, but I know that for myself, when I start moping I normally have this voice or feeling in the back of my head that keeps telling me I should be doing something productive rather than trying to distract myself with YouTube videos (which are good in a moderate amount), or surfing the web (also good in a moderate amount), and completely ignoring the problem. What am I trying to say with this? I’m trying to say that you’re the one who controls how you feel. If you feel like moping, instead of focusing on whatever is making you mopey, try to think of ways to fix it. If something doesn’t go your way, it doesn’t mean that it’s over, done, you can never try again, but quite the opposite. If things aren’t going your way, why? Why didn’t it work? Why didn’t people care? And what can I do to make them care or make it work?

If you can’t quite get a handle on how to make your problems better at the moment, try to focus instead on what’s going right in your life. It can be anything. It can be your favourite TV show, not being dead (this is a positive), it can simply be that you always have another chance to try. If this sounds like that gratitude thing that people tell you to do to make your life better and be more positive, it’s because it is. I’ve never been able to stick with it long term, but it is good to take a step back from your life and see the good things in it. Everyone has something they can be thankful for.

If being grateful and trying to solve your problems isn’t working, than do something productive. You’ll feel better if you just do something. (And no. Binge watching on Netflix is not productive. *sigh*). If you really can’t think of something (you could probably clean something in your house) then you can exercise. Any form will do. Just get out of the house or move around inside if that’s your cup of tea.

Moping is okay in small doses. You shouldn’t force yourself to be happy all of the time. But it’s also important to recognize when moping is preventing you from moving on and fixing your problems. You can’t let it run your life. You need shove moping to the curb and embrace your problems. It’s the only way to grow.  

Also, if your moping is going beyond the normal scale and you feel like you can’t ever shake the feeling, then it might be something more serious, like depression. This is post is not intended for those people (although the tips can still help), and if you do think you have depression you should seek help, or at least research about it.


Photo Credit: Johnathan Nightingale Harumph. via photopin (license)

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